FreedomSwap Remix
by Relic Maniac
Summary: Carol the Wildcat is out living her perfectly acceptable not-at-all criminal life when a piece of a spacecraft falls out of the sky and crushes her motorbike. Now, alongside her dragon best friend, a dog from space, and an alchemist turtle-duck, Carol will beat up an evil snake and get revenge for her bike! And save the world, I guess.
1. Prologue

|| Hi it's Spookyrus/mpuppy4 this is my side account for Freedom Planet AU shenanigans! Please enjoy this nonsense. ||

* * *

In a rustic little kingdom to the north, all was quiet and calm. Vast waters rippled softly, stars twinkled overhead. Against the landscape of greens and blues stood a large, powerful structure: the kingdom's Royal Palace. It overlooked the city as a symbol of strength and protection, a reminder to its denizens that all was well. For a time, in this place, the world was peaceful.

That was, until the peace was broken.

From within the palace walls, the earth began to shake. Soldiers standing guard looked around curiously, and, as the tremors grew stronger, so did they grow panicked. Soon the ground had given way beneath them, crumbled stone falling away into inky abyss, taking the soldiers with it.

Those who remained looked on in horror as a monstrous, golden metal paw lifted itself from the chasm and gripped the floor with ferocious claws the size of a dozen men. As it pulled the rest of its enormous feline body into view, the air was filled with sickening laughter that echoed up and down the corridors. The soldiers raised their guns, opening fire on the mechanical monstrosity before them, but try as they might, they couldn't so much as make a scratch. The visor over the contraption's face lifted slowly, revealing a gleaming green light that resonated with energy. For a moment, there was quiet as the soldiers stared up at the light, almost as if entranced. And all at once, it let loose a devastating laser beam, ripping across the ground, through the soldiers, and up the wall. Everything in its path was gone.

The wretched mechanical beast stomped across the palace, the cackling it gave off filling the throne room. As the doorway collapsed to make room for the intruder, the King of Shuigang rose from his royal seat, battle axe in hand. He looked on as a _click_ came from the robot, and its cockpit lowered, revealing the figure at the wheel. The laughing faded as the figure stood, staring down with striking reptilian eyes. Donning heavy armor and gripping the robot's controls with metal hands attached to metal arms, the creature grinned a twisted, fanged grin.

"Hello... Your Majesty."

The King snarled, his grip on his axe tightening. "This is _impossible!"_ he exclaimed. "Our walls are impenetrable!"

The snake man gave a sly smirk. "Your floor isn't."

The King clenched his fist, eyes burning with indescribable fury. "Well then, if it is death that you seek... I will _**gladly provide it!"**_

He leaped into the air, raising his axe over his head, and as he did, the snake man pulled back on the controls. The robot reared up, and the axe slammed into the visor, smashing it open and revealing that green glow. The King ducked down as the laser fired, and it just barely grazed his head, annihilating his crown and the wall behind him. He stuck his landing, then bounded up again, but this time was not so successful. A set of thin black cannons emerged from the robot's shoulders and fired off a round of plasma blasts, each and every one of which landed a direct hit. The King crashed back down, his weapon falling from his hands and clattering on the ground. Before he could retrieve it or even so much as stand, he was pinned beneath the robot's mighty paw, and no matter how he struggled, he could not break free.

"Now now, Your Majesty..." The snake man winked and waved a metal finger from side to side. "Let's not be so hasty! I'm not looking for any trouble. I'm only here to _relieve you_ of that great throne of yours. Let somebody else have a turn on it."

The King growled through gritted teeth. "If you honestly think you can overthrow our lineage—"

"Ah-ah!" The snake man lifted his hand and waggled a finger. "I wasn't talking about me. Though I _am_ very great." He put his toothy smirk back on, leaning over his robot's head so that his eyes met the King's directly. "No, I have somebody different in mind. A little more _fresh meat._ You might know him! His name is—"

 _Smack._ The snake man was cut off by a projectile blasting him upside the head, exploding against him and leaving smoke in its wake. With a snarl, he whipped around to face the offender. Then, his lips curled back up into a grin. He turned his robot around, removing its foot from the King's chest and allowing him to sit up and catch his breath, only until the mechanical beast's tail coiled around his body to suspend him in the air. At the other side of the room, standing where the doorway had once been, was a young man, draped in the Kingdom's royal green, eyes burning just as fiercely as the King's.

 **"Spade!"** the King exclaimed.

"Unhand my father and I _might_ spare your life," declared Prince Spade, glowering unto the intruder who smirked down upon him.

The snake man tapped a finger to his chin. "Hm, let me think about that... No."

Spade hurdled forward, dodging around the plasma blasts that were fired on him. Speedily gathering his irregular weapons of choice, he released a barrage of playing cards onto the robot. Yet, it barely left a scratch. He gritted his teeth and dashed backwards, and the robot's foot crashed down where he had been mere moments ago.

"Tchya!" The snake man cackled. "Nice try!"

"You're not going to get away with this," the Prince spat.

"Really? Because it sure looks like I am." With another snicker, the intruder continued, "Don't even bother fighting, boy. You'll only make it harder for yourself and your dear old dad, and besides, I need you to look presentable. I'm doing what I'm here to do, and I'm finishing it right now!"

Spade snorted. "Yeah? You and what army?"

The snake man raised a brow cockily, and Spade's confidence faltered. Without breaking eye contact, the intruder tapped a button on his control panel, and the sound of marching filled the halls. Spade turned, and with a barely audible gasp, his eyes widened in shock. Before him was row upon row of heavily armored unnatural slime creatures, each with a scarily large high-tech rifle in hand. They marched through the gaping opening in the wall and across the wreckage, halting just before the Prince.

His eyes darted across the army in a panic as the snake man's cackling once again filled the palace, and each trooper met him head on with a single grotesque eye. Fists clenched, Spade dove for the troops. In one swift movement ripping the cards from his artillery and sending them crashing across the army, loud explosions rang out and dust was sent flying into the air. Several soldiers were destroyed, but the many that remained took aim and opened fire. With a howl of pain, Spade was on the floor.

"Spade, _**NO!**_ _"_ the King cried over the unending laughter. As two of the troopers grabbed Spade by the arms and restrained him, the King lifted his head up and clenched his eyes shut, tears welling up in them. Under the unbearable pressure of the tail's coil, he wailed, "What do you want from us?!"

At that, the laughter stopped. The tail moved up, then swiftly down, slamming the King into the ground and uncoiling to leave him writhing there. The robot turned back around, looming over the King as he stared up at it. The snake man smirked maliciously down at him.

"It's nothing personal, really," he explained soothingly. "It's just that there's something here that I need, and I need you if I'm going to get it. More accurately... I need you out of the picture."

As the robot's paw was slowly lifted over him, the King lowered his head. Across the room, he saw his son, struggling desperately under the hold of his captors. He stopped just soon enough for his father to catch his eye, and for a moment, just a moment, they looked at each other. In an instant, Spade was frozen, as if time were standing still. But there was no time left.

"Goodbye, Your Majesty!"

When the instant had passed, the King closed his eyes in silent acceptance, and with a forceful _SLAM,_ the robot's paw crashed down on him.

Pale petals scattered across the floor.

The King of Shuigang was no more.

 _ **"NO!"**_ Spade shrieked, his voice horrified and shrill. He looked on, eyes wide and wet, as the robot's terrible foot was removed from the crushed remains of what had once been his father. There was no laughter from the one responsible for this. There was only deafening silence.

"You, you... _**MURDERER!"**_

Screaming for all it was worth, the orphaned Prince explosively hurled himself into the air and dove straight for the perpetrator. But in a swift movement, the snake man whipped his arm around and grabbed Spade out of the air by the neck, leaving his body to flop limply. He struggled to choke down air, fading in and out of consciousness, eyes filled only with rage and the image of a twisted reptile's grin. With his free hand, the snake man snapped his fingers. "Syntax," he hissed.

Obediently, the robotic monstrosity sat itself down. With a _click,_ its jaw lowered, two long, pointed tentacles detaching from it. From the robotic mount's head emerged another, smaller robot, this one with a large glass head and piercing green eye. It levitated before the pilot, who fired a wicked smirk.

"Let's get this show on the road."

With a _click_ and a shock, the prince's screams pierced the moonlight.


	2. Dragon Valley

|| Oh my god I updated FSR, what timeline is this ||

* * *

 **Dragon Valley**

In a dusty little valley to the east, all was quiet and calm. Waters in long rivers and wide lakes rippled and shined under the light of the sun. Leaves high in tall trees rustled softly with the wind. Tiny birds perched in those trees sang tiny songs. For a time, in this place, the world was peaceful.

That was, until the peace was broken.

 **"YAAAAA-HOOOO!"**

The roar of a motor ripped through the silence as a red vehicle hurdled across the landscape, sending dust flying in all directions. It flew over a hill and crashed down on its two wheels, rattling the greenery and sending birds fluttering in fear as it zoomed away. The rider glanced around and flashed a wide, toothy grin. "Try to catch me this time!"

Through the shadows of the brush, a figure darted forth and burst into the sunlight, rocketing through the air at incredible speeds. Landing at the motorcycle's side and keeping pace, the figure returned the enthusiastic smile. "Right behind you!"

With a shift of the gears and a slam of a boot on the gas, the bike raced forward, tires screeching. It weaved back and forth around rocks and trees, the driver's long scarf and tail whipping with the movement. It bounded over a long chasm in the earth and soared down, pulling a sick flip and turning rightside up just in time to stick the landing. It raced ahead, passing a little round robot with pointy legs and a small turret, then crashing through another identical bot that busted to pieces. The challenger leaped over these obstacles, rivaling the bike's speeds even on foot, but lost the edge somewhere along the way. The motorcycle spiraled up a great hill, the rider leaning forward into the gaining momentum, until finally they had reached the highest peak in the area. The bike screeched to a halt and its driver pounded a fist into the air.

 **"ALLLLLLRIGHT! SCORE ANOTHER WIN FOR THE AWESOMEST WILDCAT ON AVALICE!"  
**  
Cackling victoriously was a green cat in black, whose long blue scarf flowed epically in the wind. Soon enough, her opponent caught up, sneakers skidding through the dirt. "You're getting pretty good on that thing, aren't you?" complimented the purple girl in green, whose head sported two pointed horns poking out from the top, two shiny earpieces on the sides, and two long strands of hair tied up in the back.

"You know it!" the wildcat replied, hopping off the bike to look up at her friend and display her array of pointy teeth. "How'd you like the taste of my dust, slowpoke? I thought dragons were supposed to be fast!"

"I am fast!" the dragon retorted pleasantly. "You're just getting faster."

"Heck yeah I am!" The wildcat gave the seat of her motorcycle a pat. "And it's all thanks to this baby! Pretty soon we're not just gonna be faster than you, we're gonna be the fastest, coolest things this planet's ever seen! Just you wait!"

The dragon chuckled. "Good luck with that."

"Now!" The wildcat turned to face the great valley, threw her arms into the air and yelled, **"WHO'S READY FOR THE BEST RAID EVER?!"**

The exclamation echoed over the area and the dragon faltered. "Uh, do you think you could maybe _not_ scream things like that to the entire world?"

"I can't hear you!" the cat shouted, holding a hand up to one of her large, pointy ears in an exaggerated movement.

The dragon raised her arms unenthusiastically. "I'm ready, hooray."

"Atta girl, that's the spirit!" The cat gave the dragon a pat on the back and started forward. "Now come on, let's go steal some crystals!"

Before the cat had even taken a step forward, the dragon grabbed her by the scarf, causing her to stumble. "But only from the rich, remember?"

"Yeah yeah, whatever." The cat rolled her eyes and tugged her scarf away. "Crystals are crystals." Expression immediately illuminating once more, she swung back around to face her partner. "But come on, you know this is gonna be awesome! This is like the best time for this, there's gonna be a buttload of people with a buttload of cash, and we're gonna be in and out like it never even happened! With all that cash! That's a lotta cash. And they'll never know what hit 'em!"

The dragon placed her hands on her hips and shook her head, though she couldn't fight the fond smile that her companion's antics encouraged. However, her attention was pulled away as her gaze wandered into the distance, smile fading. "Uh, Carol?"

"Just imagine the looks on their faces when they notice all their stuff is missing! They'll be like, 'Oh goodness me what in heavens has become of all my cash? It's not in my stupid spoiled little rich person pockets anymore! How unorthodox! How insidious! How, how... _vicarious!'"_

"Carol..."

"And I'll be like, 'Guess what, stupid spoiled rich people? We got your cash, it's ours now! And there ain't nothing you can do about it! 'Cuz there ain't nobody who can stand a chance against the unstoppable duo of Carol the Wildcat... and her AMAZING motorcycle!'"

 **"CAROL!"**

"What, what?! Whaddya interrupting for, that's rude, y'know?! That's super rude!"

"Look." The dragon pointed into the distance, and Carol followed her point. She raised a hand over her eyes and squinted, and somewhere up and away, Carol spotted an anomaly: a little dark blue splotch against the light blue sky.

"What the heck..."

As the splotch drew closer, it became apparent that it was not a splotch at all, but some sort of strange, unidentified flying aircraft. Not only that, but it wasn't alone. Several green helicopters were in hot pursuit, whirring at a volume that rattled the world below. The defenseless little aircraft tried desperately to escape, already in critical condition as thick smoke trailed from its sputtering engine. But no matter how it tried, it could not outfly its pursuers. Soon its metal body was being bombarded with artillery from all angles, and with a **_BOOM,_** the right side of the poor little ship exploded into pieces; pieces which rained down upon the little valley below, one of which hurdled directly at the girls on the hill.

 **"WHAT THE HECK?!"**

 **"GET DOWN!"**

The dragon tackled the wildcat to the ground, and seconds later, the ship's wing **_CRASHED_** right where they had been standing. A wave of dust blew over them, and once it dissipated, the two looked back in horror. This horror only grew for Carol as she bore witness to the carnage that the wing had wrought.

 **"MY BIKE!"**

She hurried to push over the wing that was now embedded in the ground, but alas, it was too late. All that remained of her beloved bike was a bunch of scattered, pitiful hunks of metal and rubber. She dropped to her knees, looking desperately through the pieces for any hope of reassembly, but it was too far gone. She let the springs and bolts fall through her fingers and hung her head in anguish.

The dragon, meanwhile, looked over the horizon as the little blue ship plunged down into the faraway jungle and disappeared from sight. There was a sickening **_CRASH_** that echoed across the valley, and thick black exhaust began to rise from the crash site. The helicopters flew right past it. "We've got to go help them!" the dragon cried.

"Help them? _Help_ them?" Carol dragged herself up to her feet, whipped around and glared into the rising smoke with unparalleled wrath. "They killed my bike!" To the sky, she declared in righteous fury, **"I'm finding whoever's responsible for this and KICKING THEM IN THE FACE!"**

"What? Carol, no!"

 **"I'M KICKING THEM, LILAC!"** Carol the Wildcat declared as she rolled down the hill and bolted in the direction of the crash. **"YOU CAN'T STOP ME!"**

Dumbfounded, Lilac the Dragon Girl stood with her hand held out as Carol disappeared into the landscape. She let the hand fall to her side and glanced back at the bike wreckage. With a heavy sigh, before she could start forward, she went back to gather the pieces.

* * *

Deep down in the jungles of the valley, at the source of the rising smog, the little blue airship was embedded deep in the dirt. It was badly dented and left with only one bent wing, and had left a long trail of mud and knocked over trees in its wake. The surrounding area was completely silent, as any creature with a brain in its skull had fled the scene long ago. But from the ship itself, a periodic clanging could be heard. _Clang._ The cockpit rattled. _Clang._ It came looser. _CLANG._

Finally, the cockpit was pried open from within, and from it emerged even more smoke, as well as the sound of dry coughing. As the smoke dissolved, a small, pale hand gripped the outside of the ship, and the creature threw its body over the edge, gasping for air. She was a little dog thing, her white fur stained with gray soot, her ginger hair messed from the botched landing. Once she'd regained her strength, she pulled up her goggles, revealing her bright blue eyes to the world. She looked over her surroundings only for a moment before steering her eyes to the outside of the ship. At the sight of its condition, she gave a squeaky gasp. Hastily, she scrambled out of the cockpit, landing unceremoniously in the dirt.

The little dog thing pulled herself up and dusted off her outfit, the black skin-tight suit as well as the blue armor that covered it, and in particular the shiny band around her left wrist. She then quickly went to inspect her vehicle. Her fingers ran across the cracked hull as she walked around it, expression somber. The missing wing alone was enough to tell her that it wasn't getting back in the air. Anxiously, she stepped back and ran her hands over her long, floppy ears. "Darn..."

Just then, a reverberating _boom_ accompanied a foreboding shadow that passed from above, and all at once, the anxiety was tripled. Body rigid, the puppy's neck slowly craned around just enough to see a green flash deep in the overgrowth. She felt every muscle tense to the point of stiffness, and yet her frail little body rattled all the same. Heart pounding out of her chest, she willed her arms to move so that she could furiously tap at the band around her arm, but it returned only with sputters of static and sparks.

 _Clang._ The sound of heavy metal rang through the forest. Breathing heavy, the little dog pried open the cover on her wristband, revealing its busted up inner workings. She moved around a couple wires with her shaking fingers, but the only result was more sparks. _Clang._ It was drawing nearer. Looking around frantically, the puppy turned back to her disparaged ship and ripped off a loose panel, pushing down the broken exhaust pipe to get to the electronic components behind it. _Clang._ She glanced back and forth between the innards of her wristband and those of the ship, tore the broken wires from the band and tossed them aside. _Clang._ She scavenged the ship desperately for any pieces that could be made use of, struggling to tug them out and hurriedly putting them in their new place. _Clang._ She pleaded gravely under her breath for just a little longer, just a few more seconds to connect these circuits and close this panel. _CLANG._

Time was up. The brush behind her was slashed away, making room for the shadow that emerged and loomed over her tiny form. Involuntarily, the little dog's body pressed itself to that of the ship, backing against it so she could face the terror that made her eyes well with tears. Heavy boots _clanged_ against the ground as the otherworldly horror stepped toward her. His form was green, muscular, with long veins popping from every inch. He towered over her, as if one step could crush her like the insect she suddenly felt that she was. His body was decked with armor and weaponry, a sharp knife gripped in one hand. Teeth gritted in a snarl, he glowered down on the little thing before him with piercing red eyes, deepened by the knit of a sharp, bushy brow.

"So," the gruesome creature boomed, tone thick with vitriol, "a mere private was able to escape from our siege. And but a puny child at that. How _adorable."_ He leaned over to get a better look at the little private, and she clenched her eyes shut and turned her head away, tears streaming down her face, body quaking with fear. The creature gave a huff of contempt and straightened himself. "If you value your own life so much, I suppose you wouldn't mind giving up the whereabouts of your companions if it means sparing yourself."

The shivering little dog searched the ground, avoiding the horrific man's gaze with all her might. Her mouth gaped, but no words could come together in it. "Well?" the man prompted. "I'm waiting, creature." The little thing could only press her eyes closed and turn away. Snarl deepened, the predator took one heavy step forward, and the prey to flinched into stillness. **"Tell me."**

"I..." the puppy breathed, "I can't..." Having caught the shaking of her voice, she froze, fists clenched. Forcibly, the shoved the fear back down her throat and stripped her body away from the cold comfort of the ship, eyes shooting open to reveal a passionate intensity. **"I** ** _won't!"_**

The beastly man drew his head back shortly, only to lower it with a glare of challenge. "So be it."

In the instant that he reached to retrieve his gun from its holster, the little dog slammed shut the panel on her wristband, and both shot their arms up at once. With the pull of a trigger, a blast of plasma was fired, not colliding with flesh, but bouncing from an undaunted surface. Again and again the trigger was pulled, but again and again the shots were reflected and fired away into nothingness. In front of the little dog, projected from her band, was a shining blue barrier that stood between her and the opponent's attacks. The creature grunted at this, lowered his gun and raised his knife. As he moved forward, a glint shone in the little dog's eye. The barrier recoiled back into the band and she drew her arm back, hand becoming shrouded in light. She threw herself to her knees and pounded her palm against the earth, and from it burst a wave of energy over that knocked back the antagonizer, who shielded his face with his arm.

When the light faded, he looked up to find that his target had disappeared. Growling, he searched his surroundings, and found movement far in the overgrowth to his right. Without hesitation, he lifted his gun and opened fire once again.

The little thing, running through the jungle as fast as her little legs could carry her, looked over her shoulder at the sound of the attack. She threw up her forcefield again, but still one of the blasts grazed her head, and she hastened to pat down the flame it left in her hair. Blindly, she fired back in the attacker's direction with the band's own tiny little laser beams, but it didn't sound like any of them hit their target. Her wide eyes looked back in hopes of catching sight of her pursuer, but the attention this cost had an unintended side-effect. Her foot caught on the exposed root of a tree, and with a shriek, she toppled onto the ground. Her little body fell victim to the cruel force of gravity, and she tumbled down the incline of earth until the earth abruptly stopped, and she was hurled over the edge of it.

As she dropped into the verdant abyss below, the horrible man sliced through the forest's foliage and approached the end of the cliff. He watched the screaming child disappear into the chasm, his eyes narrow with skepticism. Before he could take any action, however, he was drawn away by the shouts of unfamiliar voices elsewhere in the valley. He glared into the drop once more, but turned away, and the gruesome creature slunk back into the darkness from whence he came.

* * *

 **"CAROL! CAROL, WHERE ARE YOU?!"**

Lilac sped across the dustlands of Dragon Valley, not quite as fast as she might have been able to were she not being weighed down by an armful of metal. As she entered into the more green and wet area of the dale, she stopped momentarily to look around, but found no sign of her feline friend. Still, the rising smoke in the sky gave Lilac a well-marked destination. "Carol, I swear, when I find you..." she muttered, and quickly stepped back from a turret-baring robot that had the audacity to fire a pellet at her, "...you'd better not be dead. **CAROL!"**

Carol was either out of earshot or just ignoring the calls, but in any case, she was on a mission. Quick as a flash, she skillfully bounded from tree to tree, leaping to swing off of a flying insect robot and slashing clean through another with a good slice of her sharp claws. Its pieces crashed to the ground, and Carol stuck her landing in front of it. "Outta the way, junkheap!" she exclaimed as she kicked a spiky bot out of her path and ran onward. "I got a bike to revenge!"

Dashing out of the thicket, Carol payed no mind to the area's stunning show of beautiful flora and cascading waters, instead turning her eyes to the morning sky. While she looked up and around to get an eye on the crash sight, the waters of the river behind her rippled and bubbled ominously. Little fish and fish-like robots swam briskly away from the lengthy figure that slunk against the current. An enormous fin gradually surfaced, and with it, the beginning of a large, round, purple head whose great eye affixed to Carol with a beady stare. Her ears perked and she turned around, but by then there was nothing above water to be seen. With an oblivious shrug, Carol lifted a leg with the intention of continuing on her way, but the step was never completed.

"Carol! There you are!"

Carol groaned and placed her foot back on the ground. She found Lilac coming up to her with a look of relief behind the pile of scrap she was carrying, though her arrival provided Carol with only mild irritation. "You've been following me this whole time, haven't you?"

"Yeah, obviously," Lilac replied. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, obviously! You're not gonna try to stop me from finding this freak, are you?"

"Uh... Well, no, I'm not stopping you from _that..."_

"Awesome!" Carol's annoyance was quickly overtaken by liveliness. "Then as long as you're here, you might as well help me kick them in the face. Good thinking grabbing that, by the way." Her grin became twisted and her claws unsheathed menacingly. "Now we can show them the consequences of their actions."

Lilac's face screwed up as Carol cackled. "I am not helping you assault an innocent person."

"Innocent?!" Carol spat. "They _killed_ my bike!"

"Do you have any proof of that?"

"Sure! You're holding it!" Carol dashed away, and Lilac's brow lowered. "Now come on! We gotta catch them before they get away!"

"Hey!" Lilac called harshly. "I meant that! I'm not going to help you with this!"

"Heheh, sure you're not," Carol snickered in reply. "But seriously, let's get moving!"

Lilac stood scowling at nothing in particular as Carol ran off, smashed another spiky robot and roared with laughter. After shaking herself in an attempt to clear her head, Lilac caught sight of the river, from which several unnervingly large fins were protruding. Her mouth fell open as she watched them steadily make their way downstream, down in the direction that Carol was heading in. Frantically, Lilac blurted, "C-Carol! **CAROL!"** But Carol proceeded anyway, so Lilac groaned loudly and took off after her, dropping a couple loose screws in her wake.

Carol rolled down the ridge along the river's edge, bowling through a couple round spiked robots and sliding under a bigger robot with two long legs that she didn't feel like dealing with. Lilac cautiously stepped around this one, hoping it wouldn't spot her, before returning to running and shouting **"CAROL!"** Carol ignored her, hopping around, bounding on top of bots and leaping across to the other side of the river, blissfully unaware of the fins that were closing the distance between them and her very fast. "Carol!" Lilac yelled, "Would you please just listen for one second?!"

Carol perked and turned to face Lilac across the roaring water. "What?!" she called.

"Get back here!" Lilac said, "The water's not safe!"

Carol's brow scrunched and she held a hand up to her ear. "What did you say?! There's a lantern in a vase?!"

"What?! No! There's something in the water!"

"They're singing to their daughter?!"

Lilac tapped one of her earpieces in confusion before shaking herself. **"UGH!** I don't know what you're saying but it's not what I'm saying!"

"I can't hear you! What are you saying?!"

With a roar of frustration, Lilac yelled, **"I'm trying to tell you!** **There's something—"**

She was cut off by a sudden looming presence as a long shadow slowly rose over the water. Carol and Lilac too slowly drew their eyes upward along the slick, wet metal form of a giant purple eel, whose dorsal fins stuck pointedly out from its body, and whose enormous head obscured the sun. Towering above the girls, it gnashed its horrific set of massive teeth and unleashed an earth-shaking **_"GRRRROOOOUUUUGH!"_** "...in the water," Lilac finished with a grimace.

"Oh," said Carol, placing her hands on her hips. "Well that just figures."

The Chomper Snake lunged at Carol, who leaped back from the attack, leaving the mechanical monstrosity to eat dirt. It crushed the earth in its jaws and eyeballed Carol once more, letting out a low _hisssss._ Carol signaled to Lilac and pointed down the stream, shouting "Come on!" Lilac nodded, and both sprinted down either side of the riverbank. The Snake gave chase, swimming up and down through the water. Seeing that it was gaining on them, Carol leaped up and gave the machination a roundhouse kick to the head. This barely left a scratch, and the Chomper Snake bared its teeth with the intention of attacking again. This provided an opening for Lilac to deliver a much more forceful kick, rattling the beast's iron skull. The girls landed on opposite sides of the water and sped onward, shooting smiles to each other.

They continued trading blows with the monster, Carol clawing at its body and eyes, Lilac kicking it and giving it a good whack with her ponytails if she could flip at just the right angle. Eventually, the Chomper Snake grew tired of taking punishment and prepared to deal some out. It opened up its mighty maw and a _gurgling_ came from within. The girls looked up at it curiously, then recoiled in fright as it let loose a terrible stream of green acid. Carol and Lilac attempted to run faster, as fast as they possibly could, and the acid scorched the earth behind them and burnt away the grass. It sprayed out and blasted through the jungle, annihilating greenery and blasting down trees. The Snake dove forward and plunged back into the water, sending out a wave on either side of the river that swept the girls off their feet and dragged in not only them, but also all of the loose carnage from the previous attack.

Carol cried out, but only bubbles released from her mouth. Lilac hugged the pile of scrap tighter to herself, but the smaller pieces still escaped her and disappeared into the whirl of water. The two tumbled out of control in the flood, the Chomper Snake's body lashing at them and whipping up the torrent that trapped them. Clutching a hand over her muzzle, Carol let her eyes dart around in search of anything she could make use of. She attempted to swim toward the first object she found, and instead it came to her, _slamming_ her in the chest and taking her farther down the river with it. She clung to it by her claws, swinging her body back and forth in an attempt to steer it. Then, finally, they surfaced, and the tree Carol was riding _SLAMMED_ into the Chomper Snake's head, knocking its bolts loose and leaving it disoriented, allowing the waters to calm.

After catching her breath, Carol laughed and pounded her fists in the air, surfing down the river on her trusty log. When Lilac surfaced, Carol saw that she'd had the same idea. Carol grinned and fired a thumbs-up. Lilac returned the one of those that she could pull off with her hands full. Both rode the water even as the Chomper Snake reemerged, spitting sparks and sputtering an electronic **_"GRR-O-O-UUU-GH."_**

The robotic beast weaved in and out of the water, and the girls giggled as they carved the rolling waves it produced. They raced neck and neck down the current, and Carol even managed to get her ride spinning in the air so she could pull a hanging corkscrew. But eventually they found that their ride was about to come to an abrupt end at the drop off where the water flowed, and they looked to each other nervously.

At that, the Chomper Snake reared up to ready a final attack, and the girls met its crooked glare head on. Lilac grabbed a tire from the heap that she had somehow managed to hold onto all this time, twirled around and chucked the thing at the mechanical pursuer. The tire smacked against the Snake's forehead and ricocheted off, this only encouraging the beast's rage. It opened its maw, the gurgle of acid rising from its gullet, but Carol was prepared. As the tire flew at her, she met it with her foot, kicking it square into the Chomper Snake's mouth and wedging it down the monster's throat.

The Chomper Snake's eyes bulged out with shock, pressurized liquid pushing at its body from within. Its metal hull cracked, acid spat from its seams, and at last, the horrible thing burst in two. The girls cheered, but only for a moment before the force of the air released by the busted beast threw them back. Just as they looked down to see the trees that had only just been standing on take a dive over the waterfall, so too were they falling into doom.

Carol shrieked at the sight of the rapidly approaching watery grave, and hearing this, Lilac lit up with resolve. The dragon tossed away the poor murdered bike parts, revved up and rocketed in Carol's direction, grabbing her out of the air and making a beeline for the shore. Lilac flipped rightside-up and released Carol from her grasp, and they stuck their landing in sync. They looked to each other, then at their surroundings as a pair of trees plunged into the water behind them and bike parts rained down on both the earth and water. After all that, a mighty **_KA-BOOM_** marked the collision of the Chomper Snake's body against the ground on the other side of the lake, and the girls swung back to see the huge explosion that complimented it. Carol and Lilac stood with their jaws dropped, staring out at the wreckage they'd wrought as flames engulfed the foliage on the lakeside, acid splashed all over everything, debris continued to fall and a tire shot past them and into obscurity.

"That... was... **AWESOME!"** Carol whooped, and she and Lilac hopped up and down in celebration. "Did you see that?! It was amazing!"

 _"You_ were amazing!" Lilac praised.

"Yeah, I was amazing! Carol one, dumb robot zero! Alright!"

"Yeah, we did it! Woohoo!"

They laughed and high-fived, then looked out over the disastrous scene. When Carol looked up, she saw something that made her illuminate. "Hey, check it out!" She pointed to the fading cloud of smoke that now wasn't so distant, and Lilac's expression fell. "We're closer than ever now, it's right over there! This is our chance! It's revenge time, baby, let's do this!" Carol sprinted off into the thicket, calling behind her, "And don't forget my bike!"

Lilac looked around at the scattered scraps all over the area, sitting on the land or drifting in the water. A piece of metal conked her on the head and she rubbed the spot it hit, grumbling tiredly.

* * *

 **"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"**

Screaming for all it was worth, the little private pup plummeted down through the forest overgrowth. Her arms and legs flailed feebly, accomplishing nothing more than sorely smacking against branches and other leafy obstacles. As she barreled down, she clenched her eyes closed, braced for impact. But abruptly, her descent stopped. Hesitantly, she peeled her eyes back open and, with a gasp, found that the ground was several feet below her.

She looked down — or more accurately, up — to find that her right leg had gotten caught on a couple of vines that were now wrapped tight around her ankle. She attempted to muster the upper body strength she didn't have to bend over and free herself, but she could barely reach the knot, much less stay in this position long enough to untangle it. After struggling for a few moments, she flopped back in defeat and heaved a sigh.

At the very least, this gave her an opportunity to finally take in her surroundings. The jungle was lush with plant life, as she had already become acquainted with. A light breeze rustled the leaves and brushed through her hair and against her lolling ears as she dangled here. Rays of sunshine gleamed down through the gaps in the leaves and decorated the world below with splotches of light, and the rumblings of running water could be made out in the distance. For the time, to just remain in this place, breathing the fresh air and swaying gently from side to side, was pretty relaxing.

 **"HYA!"**

 _Snap._

 **"AAAAAHHHH!"**

This was suddenly interrupted by the ambush of a creature from the bushes, who pounced into the poor little private with force that ripped the vines clean off. They both fell to the forest floor and wrestled through the dirt, and ultimately it was the attacker who came out on top and pinned the private down by the shoulders.

"I found you, bike killer!" Carol exclaimed, snarling in the terrified puppy's face. "You thought you could just commit bloody motorcide and walk away like it never happened, huh?! Well I got news for you, buster! You can't! 'Cuz I'm here to revenge my fallen comrade!" Looking tearfully into the distance, she choked, "And it was so young! It should have been me..." The little dog pinned beneath her fought to break free, but Carol scowled and grabbed her by the chest plate, pulling her up so they were nose-to-nose. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"I-I-I have no idea what you're talking about!" the puppy sobbed, eyes wide and wet. "Please don't hurt me, mister!"

Carol's face contorted indignantly. "I'm a _girl!"_

"Huh?"

There was a revving sound in the distance, and Carol looked over her shoulder only to be rammed into and blasted away, both she and the dog shrieking in response. Lilac threw her head up and knocked Carol into a large rock, then skidded to a halt in front of her. "Aw, come on!" Carol hissed, rubbing her aching behind. "I had her!"

"What are you thinking?!" Lilac scolded. "You can't just attack a little kid!"

"Sure I can!" Carol retorted. _"I'm_ a little kid!"

"That is not an excuse."

At the sound of whimpering, both looked to Carol's shivering victim, who froze under their stares. Carol stood up and the puppy yiped, scooting back fearfully until she backed into a tree. Lilac's scowl loosened into a look of pity. "Hey, hey, it's okay," she cooed, stepping toward the little dog who tensed in response. "Don't worry. We're not going to hurt you. _Right,_ Carol?" Lilac shot a glare back at her companion, who only glared back and hissed.

Despite Lilac's best efforts, the timid little pup curled up and buried her face in her knees, sniveling and trembling. Lilac looked away, disheartened. Then she turned and looked sternly to Carol, gesturing to the wreck of a child before them. Carol sighed in annoyance and Lilac stepped back as she approached.

"Hey, look." Carol crouched in front of the puppy. "I'm sorry I pounced you," she drawled, "I didn't mean it. You don't gotta be like that."

With a sniffle, the puppy looked up, tears rolling down her cheeks. "You're... not mad?"

"Well, you don't _look_ like a bloodthirsty bike murderer," Carol replied. "So, nah. We're cool."

At that, the little dog's eyes glistened. She looked Carol up and down, sticking to the furry appendage that flicked impatiently behind her. "Can..." the puppy asked, "Can I touch your tail?"

 _"What?"_

At Carol's bewilderment and disgust, the puppy's face flushed with embarrassment. "Oh... I'm sorry. Never mind."

Carol looked incredulously back at Lilac, who returned with an equally bemused shrug. Seeing the puppy look away with pink cheeks, Carol threw her head up and groaned. "Alright. Fine." She sat down with her back to the little one. "But if you pull, I will destroy you."

Brightened despite that last remark, the little puppy gently pet the tail, running her hands in the direction the fur faced. It was soft to the touch, and the puppy smiled and giggled. "It's so fluffy!" Carol cringed and stuck her tongue out while Lilac held a hand over her mouth to cover her stifled laughter. When the dog was done, Carol stood up and helped her to her feet. "Um..." the puppy said, folding her hands behind her back, "What did you say your name was?"

Proudly, Carol placed her hands on her hips and put on a toothy smile. "Carol the Wildcat, at your service!" she declared. With less enthusiasm, she added, "AnnnnnnndthisisLilac."

"Hi..." the little dog greeted shyly when Lilac approached.

"It's nice to meet you," said Lilac. "And what's your name?"

"Oh!" the pup piped with a start. "I'm Milla! It's nice to meet you too!"

"So, you're the one who was flying that funky blue thing, right?" Carol asked, and Milla nodded. "Nice landing, by the way."

"What are you doing out here?" Lilac inquired. "The skies haven't been safe for days."

Milla tucked her tail between her legs and tapped her fingers together nervously. "It's kind of a long story..." she answered. "I'm not exactly from around here."

Lilac looked to the sky and tapped a finger to her chin thoughtfully. "Those green choppers... they must have belonged to Shuigang."

"Gross," said Carol. "What does Shuigang want with a kid like you?"

"I-I-I dunno!" Milla stammered. "But, now my ship can't fly anymore... So, I can't get where I was going..." Ears folded back, she sniffled, "I don't know what I'm gonna do..."

Lilac clutched her hands to her chest, eyes soft with compassion, while Carol appeared unimpressed. Lilac turned a pleading look to Carol, who grimaced and shook her head. This continued for an extended period of time, Lilac pushing to appear more pathetic and Carol adamantly holding her stance, but eventually it became too much, and Carol caved. "WELL..." Carol huffed, "I guess if you're stuck here... you could always come chill at our secret hideout."

The suggestion made Milla's ears perk back up in an instant, and she gave a little gasp. "REALLY?"

"Yeah, sure," Carol replied, casting a scowl to Lilac. "It's not like a secret hideout is supposed to be secret, or anything."

Lilac nodded and smiled warmly. "We'd be happy to have you."

"Oh, thank you! Thank you so much!" Milla took Carol's hands in hers and shook them gleefully. "That's so nice of you!"

"Yeah..." Carol pulled her hands back. "Don't get used to it."

Milla might not have heard that part, or at least didn't acknowledge it, as she caught sight of something a few meters away that grabbed her attention. "Hey! Is that yours over there?"

"Huh?" Carol looked around and found what Milla was talking about; the pile of metal and rubber that Lilac had abandoned when she arrived. "Oh, yeah. That's just my bike. You know. The one that got wrecked. By _your_ wing."

"Oh! Yeah. Sorry about that..."

"Nah, it's fine," said Carol with a shrug as Milla went over to examine the pieces. "I'll just have to go bikeless from now on." Carol pressed a palm to her chest and looked out wistfully. "Spend the rest of my days treading the world on foot, but a wandering soul with no wheels to guide her."

"Hmm... Actually..." Milla rearranged the bike pieces inquisitively. "I think I could put this back together."

"Wait what."

"Yeah! It's just a small land vehicle with two wheels that runs on liquid fuel, right?" Milla held up one of the bike's wheel studs and smiled. "I could do something like that if I had the parts."

Carol drew in a long, dramatic gasp, and Lilac chuckled in amusement. "Well, there's plenty of parts around the valley," said the latter.

 **"YEAH!** There's scrap all over the place!" Energy returned, Carol darted up to Milla and pulled her closer by the arms. "And you could really use that to fix my bike? Just as fast and cool and awesome as it was before?"

"Uh, sure!" Milla yipped. "I just need somewhere safe to work on it."

"Then what are we waiting for?! Let's get you there! Come on!"

"O-Oh! Okay!"

Carol snagged Milla by the wrist and ran off, Lilac snatching the wheel from Milla as she was dragged by. "Let's go, everybody!" Carol shouted with fervor. "To the secret hideout!"

"Wait, wait!" Lilac cried, rushing to recollect all the bike scraps and dropping a few in her haste. "Wait for me!"

"Try to keep up, slowpoke!"

And so the three little girls on the threshold of newfound friendship sped off into the deep forests of Dragon Valley, laughing joyfully all the way. But far, far above, in the vast blue skies, there soared those wretched helicopters. Past them, with a resonating _boom,_ zoomed a great, dark ship. It disappeared over the horizon, far and away from where the girls wandered, making its way to the city only barely visible in the distance.

* * *

|| space hard and cold, cat warm and soft ||


End file.
